BROKEN HEART

Hi, i know its not the good condition to writing about broken up feeling in this Pandemic / COVID 19 situation. But i just want to sharing about how i feel. In this middle of isolated time, an silent moment and stressfull phase for everyone, i adding 1 sad situation in my life:

Broken Heart.

At least it is what happened on me nowdays. 

I was broke up from my last relationship. It was long distance relationship, then may it not worked really well in this world situation. Or maybe i was the one that love too much? I don't know. I can't thinking clearly..

I know the relationship still earlier (arround 4months), but it doesn't meaning that there is no meaningfull moment I shared and had with my ex-bf. i adore him, because he was the purest man i ever met. He was truth; and honest. So when he said start confiushing whats on his mind last 2 weeks ago, its brokes my heart so damn. When i try to want some pampered loves and attentions in this situation, he was tried to be survived facing this pandemic situation without able to explain how stressfull he was.

I feel so guilty about what i did, because i annoyed him just because at that time i was his gf. I knew he was told me that he was so stressfull bout today situation and life and laso our relationship that seems so distances, i tried to offering my help and cares. But its not really enough to help him go out from his problems. I knew he need time and some silent space to heal his internal circle. I don't want to say it was problems, but let we call it just an circle of life. Because I really trust, the circle will changes someday.

So shortly, we were broke up. He said want space. Alone. I even don't know how or what i will do because there is actually naturally space between us after that moment. We not talk too much and ignore each others. I still care about him much. But i don't know what i will do. I just thinking.. When probably i try to contact him again, maybe he still sensitives about us and the emotional feeling  between us. I know he need more time to fix his stuff and regulates his self. I hope he is okay in his own place now because i heard that Corona get worse there.

 Everytime i still think about him, because all i want all the best for him. 
I can't talk to him for now, but i know he still cares about me..
I know he just need sometimes with his self..
For whatever it will be,

I wish he always happy and enjoy his life,
For my 143, bee